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The Faculty and Trustees of W.C. Fields University
cordially invite you to attend the celebration of the founding of the University and
the 125th Birthday of its Founder and President, W.C. Fields on January 29, 2005 from 7:00 p.m. to 11:00 p.m.
at the home of Tom Sandbach, 1403 Shallcross Avenue, Suite 406, Wilmington, Delaware.
Kindly R.S.V.P to tom.sandbach@justicetech.org or by calling (302) 571-9463
(Your RSVP will ensure that the Trustees have sent this email to the correct address
and assure Tom Sandbach that you are still among the living)

W.C. Fields University - Where Diversity Meets Eternity

The FU Way

W.C. Fields University is an independent, coeducational institution founded in 2004 to provide a quality education in the tradition of great universities like Harvard, Princeton and Liberty University. It is named after FU founder and benefactor, W.C. Fields. The great comedian has decided to dedicate his entire fortune to the establishment of this fine institution of higher learning. As our founder stated at the time of his generous donation, "Although the college of hard knocks was good enough for me, these little bastards can't learn a damn thing if you don't shove it down their throats. So I decided that since somebody's got to do it, I might as well do the shoving!"

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The FU Advantage

Fields University, located in the verdant hills of Wappinger Falls, New Jersey, offers programs in the humanities, the natural and social sciences, and in professional areas such as business, education, medical, theological, and law studies. Students are taught by the most brilliant minds in their fields, while tuitions are kept low as a result of the innovative recruitment practices that our Founder has instituted. While other colleges may recruit bright young faculty members, who demand perks like like high tenure track salaries and sabbaticals, as the professors prove themselves in their areas of study, FU takes a different approach. All of our faculty are dead. Most long dead. We don't even have to feed them.

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The FU Faculty

Physics Albert Einstein	Medicine Albert Schweitzer	Rhetoric Charles McCarthy	Law Charles  W. Kingsfield, Jr.
Business William ("The public be damned") Vanderbilt	Women's Studies Mae West	Political Science Richard M. Nixon	English William Shakespeare (Artist's conception, photograph not available)

Life at FU

	The University has adopted the wild percheron stallion as our mascot. Here, our Founder and President, W.C. Fields urges the Fields University mascot,Whitey the Mighty Percheron, on to a great victory in the coming game.
Fields University encourages cordial relationships between the administration and faculty. Here the Founder and President conducts sensitive contract negotiations with our Director of Women's Studies.
	The faculty at Fields University are very supportive of the athletic programs at the University. Professor Nixon is seen here congratulating FU football coach Woody Hayes on a great Mighty Percheron victory.